Did you read that correctly – ‘Divine Depression’?
Why would I even say such a thing? I mean doesn’t ‘divine’ mean excellent or delightful or beautiful or even godly? Can depression possibly be any of those things?
Well, no it can’t. It’s awful. It’s depression. And believe me, I take it seriously. For some people, it can even be fatal. Depression is serious business.
But many years ago when I was first faced with depression, I was forced to find a better way to live and I did just that! I found a way to live that suited me better, brought out the best in me, and did not put others first. I was forced to put ME first. That was not easy for this mom, this wife, this people pleaser. But it was necessary.
Over time I discovered that I was an introvert, simply put, people tire me. I stopped feeling guilty when didn’t enjoy crowds or parties and or travel. I stopped blaming myself (making myself further depressed) by accepting that it wasn’t my fault. I was the way I was, the way God made me.
I found ways to not just put in time, but to recapture activities that had once brought me joy such as swimming, painting, and sewing. I realized that my daily walk was not just something I enjoyed but something I needed and I increased my time doing that. I realized my quiet daily devotions fed me better than my church did and I embraced my precious Bible more than ever before. )Church is not so easy for an introvert.)
Recently, after months of spending time writing my latest book ‘My Bible Tells Me So’ (not yet available) I craved my old activities and so this week I have been sewing- and sewing – and sewing. It has been like spending time with a long-lost friend. That caused me to remember how my hobbies helped me.
And that caused me to realize that if I didn’t suffer from depression I would never have learned how to immerse myself in my hobbies and live in a way that suits me so well.
Oprah used to talk about ‘living your best life’, which usually implied accomplishments. I’m not talking about accomplishments. I’m talking about living in a way so you can cope, even thrive with depression. I’m talking about figuring out what activities to take part in and which ones to avoid. I am talking about resting when you need to rest and to not feel guilty about that.
And so God used my depression and continues to use it to bless me and help me and nurture my natural gifts. If it were not for this battle I would not be living such a fulfilling life.
And so I can say that my ‘divine depression’ has made a victorious sufferer out of me.
What about you? Is the way you live working for you? Would you like to make some changes but don’t know where to start? I know someone who can help you with that – the one and only true living God, the one who created you, the one who loves you with an unfailing love. Get quiet with him and ask him to help you. He is waiting.
Wendy, your have expressed yourself clearly and beautifully and uniquely! What you have said is very encouraging for any reader – those who live with depression, those who encounter it from time to time, and those who rarely encounter it.
Thanks Gail for taking the time to comment. You know as well as anyone the struggle of mental illness after so many years of serving those who suffer.
Thank you Gail, from someone who understands depression as a long time, gifted and compassionate counsellor.